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Monday, January 8, 2018

SHOCK & AWE

...this just in....!!!

You heard it here first

Recently discovered documents reveal that when asked to verify if she was in fact a virgin, Mary replied yes, except for that one time.

She thought you had to do it three times before you lost your virginity.

If you think that's bad, it gets worse

JESUS DID "NOT" DIE ON THE CROSS

He went into a coma.  After a good nights rest he woke.  He made some noise and a passing homeless person helped him move the stone.

When he was thanking him he saw Mary Magdalene coming. 

He hid behind a bush.  Mary went into the tomb.  No Jesus she came out.  Jesus popped
up.  Hallelujah a miracle.  Jesus done rose from the dead.

He told her....let's get outta' here, these Jews are trying to kill me.

They went to a olive grove.  Mary had a joint stuck between her swollen breast
that glistened with sweat in the moonlight.

He was a thirty two year old Horney virgin.  Nature took it's course.  It's was so intense that after ejaculating he expired.
Curiously he screamed ...ooh!! Gawd here I cum just before he took his last breath.

Once was enuff.  She got pregnant and gave birth to a little red haired girl.

They eventually disappeared into France

 



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