ELLEN

The media is all a buzz this morning because

ELLEN DEGENERES

dislocated a finger.  Seems she had two glasses of wine

and tripped on a step and crashed into a door.

I can drink a liter and not even feel it. 

She went to the hospital and they snapped it

back into place.

Some organization gave her

$10,000

for it.

Ten grand for a lousy dislocated finger.

When I was a kid I broke a leg.  When I got older

an arm.  Followed by a hand, another finger then both

arms in a fall.  I had three operations and was in

a cast for a year and never saw an gawdamn penny.

Wa' da' fuck